Thursday, May 22, 2014

I was chastened…

Monday night Jessi headed off to her last Doerre Orchestra concert.  As I gave her a kiss, she looked me in the eyes and told me, “This could be my LAST concert.”  The tears sprang into my eyes.  Then she climbed into the front seat, the harp protectively behind her in the van, and they drove off while she waved good-bye to me.

And I prayed.  Like I have been doing 24/7 since we started thinking about this adventure.

Jessi loves the harp.  She loves playing in the orchestra.  And that doesn’t look like a possibility in Louisville.  Their orchestra programs doesn’t have harps.  Sigh.

As she looked at me, there was neither anger or hardness, there was just Jessi.  A phrase from the scriptures went through my head, “willing to submit. . . . even as a child doth submit to her father.” (Mosiah 3:19)

I prayed and pleaded.  “Please bless her for her obedience, for being willing to submit to everything.”

And an answer came.

Do you think I wouldn’t?”

As with all spiritual communications, it was so much more than the words.  There were so many emotional communications along with it, chastisement, love, and reassurance.  But if I had to put it into human vernacular, it would be, “Really? Don’t you know me at all?” 

Wow!  I backpedaled fast!  “Yes, yes, of course You will.”

In that instant of heavenly communication, I was reminded that He is who He is, the Creator of the universe, God himself.  When we obey any commandment, we are blessed.  He loves my children so much more than I do.  He knows what He is doing, even when all I see is everything falling apart.  The prayers I have been praying for the past month need to change.  Instead of wearying the Lord with everything I am freaking out about, I need to remember WHO I am talking to.  I need to remember the blessings and His character.  I need to not doubt Him, which is what I’ve been doing with my constant worrying.

I’m grateful for this gentle slap upside the head.  It stopped me and made me look and realize what I have been doing was complaining and not praying.  My prayers are changing and the blessed and wonderful peace is back.  I am grateful!

Philippians 4:6-7

6 Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.